I've started feeling a little low, and fortunately realized right away that I must be overextending myself.

I haven't really been doing that much, but I did go out with the boys on an excursion every day this week, two days of which I went out without Terry's help.

This is apparently too much activity for me to handle, otherwise I wouldn't be feeling blue. I remember when I felt down around week 37 of pregnancy, and I cut my activity level way back and I perked right up. So I guess I was so stir-crazy that I overdid it on my first week "out".

I'm still going to try taking over watching W for more hours in the morning to relieve T, who is already talking about hiring a morning nanny (in addition to our afternoon nanny) so he won't have to watch W at all except for bath & bedtime. I really can't relate to his level of distress at childcare, but it's obvious he's unhappy with the current situation, so we'll have to come up with something.

But rather than taking W & M out for an excursion every morning, I'll have to come up with some way to amuse him around the house. Maybe I'll aim for an excursion just twice a week. We'll go to the Wednesday programs that the library puts on over the summer, and one errand day. If we need to do more shopping than I can do in one day, I'll send W out with T. T seems to handle him better when they have an activity.

The other days I'll come up with things to do around the farm. I can line up more playdates. If I time it for right after I feed Max, I could leave M in the house with T and then take W down to swim in the pond. We don't let his sitter MA take him to the pond, and I haven't been down there since before M was born. Well, I walked there once but I haven't been swimming. I also miss going to our little playground with W, and I could walk down there with M in the wrap.

I suspect that a little more physical activity in the morning will help W take a nap in the afternoon. And I could use a little bit of physical activity, too. Just not a lot. And going places with two kids in car seats, etc. is more activity than just walking around the farm. I'm pretty sure it's the lifting that is doing me in. Lifting W into and out of the car, lifting him into and out of his car seat (well, he can climb in if I give him a boost into the car), lifting W into and out of shopping carts. It's too much lifting to do that every day until I'm fully recovered.

So I'll scale back a bit next week and see if my mood doesn't improve. If I still feel bad even after cutting back my excursion level, then I suspect that means the problem is the waking up to care for M overnight. He's still not on a consistent schedule, and some nights (and days) I get more sleep than others. It might just be that I've had a number of rough nights in a row, and I know I haven't been napping particularly well during the day lately. But I haven't bothered charting that sort of thing, so it's just a guess. Whatever it is, I'm hopeful with a little more rest I'll feel better soon.