Nov
29
2008

  Continued Lack of Focus

I made a little bit more progress taking down the Halloween decorations today. I threw out the spent tea light candles, took down and put away all the autumn leaves garlands, and folded all the empty pumpkin bags. I also took down two of three metallic pumpkin accordion-fold decorations from the dining room. But then I got tired of that, and played the piano for about an hour. Now I'm bored playing piano, and don't feel like going back to the decorations.

I guess I'll be hungry for lunch soon, it's late but we didn't finish breakfast until around 10am this morning since we slept in. Then hopefully Terry will want to go on our walk, and maybe I'll be a little invigorated after that. But I doubt it. The lack of motivation is definitely from being off the ADD meds.

I wasn't sure, but I've been feeling so out-of-it and irritable that I went to talk to the therapist I used to see for my infertility issues. She immediately could tell that I was off the meds, since she knew me both before and after I was diagnosed with both the dysthymia and ADD and so before and after I started taking meds for the conditions. She attributed pretty much all my complaints to either being off the ADD drugs or on a lower dose of anti-depressants, which was reassuring, since I didn't know if my newfound indifference to everything was being caused by pregnancy and was a harbinger of bad things to come. I'll talk to my doctor about going back to my normal level of Wellbutrin at my next visit, although there's really nothing I can do about the ADD since those drugs are proven to be bad for babies so I just have to live with it. But I think it will be easier to live with if I'm not ALSO kind of depressed all the time.